Quotes on marriage ...

There'll be a few weddings coming up this year so I thought it would be appropriate to share the following ... enjoy while you can!

Recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.  ~David Bissonette

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. ~Sacha Guitry

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. ~Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ~Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. ~Dumas

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want? ~Sigmund Freud

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. ~Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
 ~Henny Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." ~Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." ~James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't." ~Patrick Murray

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming:
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
 ~Nash

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. ~Anonymous

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. ~Henny Youngman

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. ~Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. ~Milton Berle

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. ~Anonymous

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." ~Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
 ~Anonymous